Nighttime is Funtime

Greetings once again from that not so regular blog - Edge of the Lemon!  How about some updates?  M and the kids are doing fine...Lexy is fricken HUGE and the other three have all gone through the January/February cold season.  It has finally hit me and now it's my turn to cough and sneeze and be reminded to cover my mouth when I do either of the previously mentioned activities.

This is always an interesting time of year for me at work.  Coming off of our "busy" season, projects are transitioned and my time starts to open up a little more (both at work and at home).  This is when I start to have a lingering guilt in my days as I leave feeling "I should have done more today".  I remember last year, I called Wheeler all worried that the email was down.  Why?  Because it had been 15 minutes and no one had sent me anything!  Yes, that's how crazy it can get at times.

So with the busy time at work starting to dissipate, now is the time when I reacquaint myself with my family and friends.  I also tell my body it's okay to get tired and be sick.  So of course, with the flood gates open, my body decides I need 8-10 hours of sleep EVERY night and I usually come down with my annual cold (which will likely linger for a good 2 weeks).

The good news for you, our faithful reader(s), is that I now have more time to focus on all of the post ideas I've been compiling over the past few months.  You can also look forward to a higher frequency and more content.  In fact, I am so confident, that I will personally give each reader $1 if I can't make another post by the end of this year!

Last time, I had posted something called Lowered Expectations.  Since that post, I have come up with a few more thoughts that I would like to share with all of you.  My office building has been going through some construction and renovation.  Our entire department was moved to another part of the building, including my office.  Now I'm not pretentious or like to be ostentatious, but this was my sign for the first few months after moving into my new office:

Again, I'm not the kind of person that has to have everything all classy and junk, but I was tempted to head over to Things Remembered at the local mall to get a new sign.  You'll notice that the last digit is a "7".  The first two months, it was a "9" and the mail room was not able to find me...TRUE STORY.  So now I have a formally printed piece of paper with my name and the correct routing number.  I still don't have anything to hold it on the glass, but the tape that was used seems to be doing the trick just fine...

Last time, I made fun of Ozzy and his current case of domestication.  Well, I spoke too soon.  While waiting for the Super Bowl to start, I caught the tail end of the "Pre-Show to the Pre-Game Show".  During that show, our favorite "couple of darkness" were sitting in front of me on my TV:

Not only does Ozzy look like Joan Rivers now, he also has a secret fantasy.  For those of you who missed this ad campaign, let me paint the picture for you - over the course of the week, the ad campaign started out by declaring "Ozzy has a secret fantasy...find out during the Super Bowl".  Wow, I figured this was going to be EPIC.  Seriously, this was Ozzy "Fricken" Osbourne!  All other secret fantasies will cower in fear over Ozzy's secret fantasy, right?  Uh, not exactly.  When it came time for the final announcement, Sharon asks Ozzy his secret fantasy.  To which The Prince of Darkness replies, "I want to fly to New York City for a colonoscopy!"  First let's acknowledge something:  Sharon Osbourne had cancer...Sharon's cancer was in her colon.  OK, now with that said - SERIOUSLY?!?!

I cannot get over the evilness that was Ozzy and how every parent in America was against him in the 70's/80's/90's because of the messages in his music.  Now we are being told by him to check the pulse of our health.  Who would win in a fight - "good" Ozzy or "evil" Ozzy?  I can't help but think of today's vulgar and out of control poster child for debauchery - Ke$ha:

With such thought inducing lyrics like "Brush my teeth with a bottle of Jack, because when I leave I ain't coming back..."  Wow, riveting.  Let's fast forward 40 years to a time when things may have slowed down for our little party girl.  I can imagine Ke$ha still donning the glitter and crazy hair, but with a more wholesome message:

Auto-Tune: Taking the talent out of singing and making careers for tone deaf people like Ke$ha since 1998.

Speaking of the Super Bowl (see what I did there), I had another reminder of my ongoing struggle with Madonna.  For those of you that don't know me very well, I am forever cursed with Madonna's "Like a Prayer".  All someone would have to say is "Life is a mystery..." and that song is stuck in my head for a week.  So watching the Half-Time Show, I started to get nervous thinking I was going to have to turn off the TV.  As the show went on and on, I started convincing myself that she wasn't going to perform the song.  I decided to go into the kitchen when I started to hear the choir.  "Huh," I started thinking to myself, "that sounds a lot like...oh no.  Oh crap!  No, no, no, NO!"  As I ran into the living room I was shouting (read: begging) for someone to change the channel before it was too late.  Unfortunately, the only two people in the living room at the time were Adler and Alex - two people 1) not able to understand what I was saying, but 2) even if they did, they would have no clue what to do with that new found information.  Apparently the tone of my voice and the sense of urgency scared poor Alex.  So as I'm screaming something incomprehensible, Alex starts crying...then Adler hands me my phone and starts laughing (he's such a trooper).  That's when my phone starts going off.  For the next 5 minutes, I am receiving 10-15 text messages from people telling me to turn on the Super Bowl and that "life is a mystery".  You all suck!

Even Madonna herself seemed to have a part to play in this:

Let's just say it was the most enjoyable part of this year's Super Bowl.  And a special thanks to everyone out there who continued to feed my unknown obsession with that song.  I wish nothing but misery for you all.

Now, on with the festivities!

A long time ago, I posted about outside noises playing a role in my dreams - Have An AWESOME Day!  I have since encountered a new version of this.  The following is my recollection of what I thought was a waking moment, but what I now hope and pray was actually a dream without me realizing it.

I'm finding the older I get, the more I look forward to sleeping.  I'd like to go back in time to meet "Young Chris" and smack him/me around for refusing to take all those naps.

Anyway, I have a hard time getting to sleep sometimes:

So I usually have to go through my entire day and then revisit some popular topics before I can calm myself down enough to fall asleep:

When all of a sudden a picture-in-picture type image popped up above my head:

***I'm pretty sure I was dreaming by this point

I became confused and then I started to panic.  I didn't know what was happening, but I knew that no one in the movies/on TV ever cuts to nothing happening (like a baby sleeping).  I had to do something, but I was too late:

And that's when it happened:

***I'm pretty sure I said that part out loud

So with Lexy actually up and crying, I am awakened out of my not so lucid dream and back into the reality of the really, real world.  Of course, this starts off a chain reaction in our house (which is a common occurrence around 3am):

Stop by sometime if you can't sleep, you can help me with the boys!

Seeing that we missed posting anything last week, I wanted to provide all of you a late Valentine's Day pic:

And of course, one of my favorites:

I'll leave the interpreting up to you...

-Cheers!